Minutes from last week:
Carbuncle issues. As in, what issues from a carbuncle? Herbie failing to comprehend how this is more important than other pressing issues [the war in Iraq (see above), the economy, will Blondie come back to Grey's Anatomy?].
It's green. Bunion nectar.
The above rehashed during dinner table discussion of swimsuit issues. What seeps out. Eventually, appropriateness of discussion called into question, a la "Right, and while we're supping?" After some back and forth, this and all topics declared "open." No subject off-limits because of precedent (re: the image of your mother's dog's anal glands needing to be "expressed," and this portrait painted while subject literally taking bite of cherry cobbler).
So. Carbuncle doing better. Subsiding, AIW.
All right, it was lanced. With hot poker. Sharpened die punch sterilized in boiling water first. Then the green gloop issued forth. Particles did indeed land on subject's left cheek. Refusal of future services proclaimed. Bathroom window open, neighbors walking by during lancing and subsequent proclamation. Entire evening declared complete debacle.
Sports note: Oregon Ducks pull proverbial "rabbit" from helmet. Referees said to be "sniffing meth" during both penultimate and final minute, when Webfoots spank Sooners. Oklahoman requests to overturn or disallow results quickly turn to dust, insult added to injury.* Pac-10 officials suspended one game, advised to visit ophthalmologists. Mallards, suddenly 3 and 0, fly higher in rankings. Prediction: lucky Ducks to lose at least three this season (karma); you saw it here first.
FORWARD to what happened next
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OVER to HerbNation HOMEPAGE
*Nevermind going to a BCS bowl, Sooners, have fun in the John Deere Dust Bowl. Quack Quack!! (2007 update: after their ur-thriller against Boise State I must tip my hat.)